22 7 / 2013
Woken up completely unsettled. I hate feeling like I’m being discussed and observed. Made out to be a liar and like I’m out of my mind. And people say it’s good to express how you feel and ask for help. Never again. Not whilst I still work there in that pit of dishonesty
01 7 / 2013
"Give me the weekend to think some things through, and I’ll see you Monday with what ideas I come up with". Today I should find out whether I get what I need. I know my words were taken seriously but whether I get anywhere is a different story. I know it’s only a job but you spend over half of your time at work and to be unhappy there isn’t good. I’ve kidded myself long enough into thinking I can just deal with it alone for much longer. Finally stood my ground and I deserve something for it, I deserve my request. fingers and toes crossed.
03 3 / 2013
Got pulled upstairs for my second talking too since Christmas at work. Supervisor Sarah ain’t doing to well. Doesn’t help that I haven’t had the support that I was promised after the first chat. I guess some people are always meant to be shit on. Seems I’ve got a decision to make.
07 2 / 2013
Don’t even use this thing anymore, just signed on for a whine, a money related whine infact. Currently wondering what the hell I’m doing wrong. I’m surrounded by people that spend ridiculous amounts of money on pointless shit, forever swanning about in new outfits and junk like that and I’m such a boring povo. My treat each month is a £20 Avon order, 20 shitting pound. Fair enough I have no over draft, no credit cards and no debts, what I have once my bills are paid is mine but there is very little of it to do anything with and it makes me hate living alone. I adore my place and don’t want to give it up after just 12months. I’m currently eating away at my savings each month just to get by and that isn’t what they are for, they are for big emergencies not for a weekly shop. I’m even jeopardising my own happiness and health staying in a position at work that makes me so unhappy at times I feel unstable, all for the sake of an extra £100 a month. I know, be thankful I have a job and all that, and I am honestly. I just don’t know what I’m supposed to do right now, how are people doing it? How are some just seeming to have no money worries at all when the rest us only just have enough go around? I just don’t get it. Blah